March 26, 2013
"Any relationship, if it is going to grow, needs private space, time together without an agenda, where you can get to know each other. This creates an environment where closeness can happen, where we can begin to understand each other's hearts.
You don't create intimacy; you make room for it. This is true whether you are talking about your spouse, your friend, or God. You need space to be together. Efficiency, multitasking, and busyness all kill intimacy.
In short, you can't get to know God on the fly."
-Paul Miller, The Praying Life
One of the biggest goals in my life, lately, has been to be the type of person that says, "I'll be praying for you," and actually be praying for you. It is so easy to spread that sentiment and then forget about it when we finally get around to praying.
I am working on finding a way to continually pray to my God, to tell Him what's on my mind in an intentional way and not just before I fall asleep at night (usually falling asleep in the middle of talking to Him...oops). While I do think the sporadic moments of prayer, that I am sure everyone has, are still sufficient for the Lord as He wants to hear from us all the time, I also believe that we need to take time to be intentional, to be still and to be focused on Him.
I am still amazed by how blessed I have felt throughout the death of my sweet boyfriend. I am still amazed at the things I am learning about him, his love and his character. I am continually amazed by the people that reach out and the people I have met through this - people that he impacted in some way. I am amazed by how loved I have felt by the Lord, never feeling His arms unfold from me. I am still amazed that God allowed me to have an intimate opportunity to get to know one of His sons and that I was lucky enough to be a part of his life. I am still amazed at the things that Richard is still teaching me, even after his passing.
I continue to pray for Richard's family and his friends as we grieve him day in and day out. I pray for us all to see the beautiful impact he had on our lives and the lessons he taught us. And I pray that we will continue to move forward, never forgetting, but certainly embracing what is before us. And I pray that we, all of us, focus on God and His plan - trusting in Him will set us free.